The Quarter-Life Crisis

I am in a reading slump. I don’t get them too often at the moment so I think I just need to switch out the book I’m reading. It’s not that I’m not enjoying it, I am, but I don’t think it’s what I want to be reading right now.

But that’s not what this blog entry is about.

When I hit twenty-five, I didn’t really have a quarter-life crisis, I was happy floating along and nothing really changed with my age. Fast forward a year.

I recently turned twenty-six (you may remember a vaguely uplifting post about it), when that happened I had a grand plan and life was good and I was feeling determined and optimistic about the future. Don’t get me wrong, I still have a plan and am feeling determined but I am also feeling incredibly anxious.

Everywhere I look, my friends from all periods of my life (from primary school through to my master’s degree) seem to have their lives together, they have great jobs, great houses/flats, some of them are buying houses. They’re going to exciting places and having exciting adventures. (Now, that last bit is something I like to observe from afar, I am a homebody and I’m happy to just chill locally – that’s not to say I never want to go on holiday but I’m more focussed on saving at the moment and that’s okay.) I see my friends getting new jobs and moving up in the world, getting higher salaries and more respected in their fields, and then the panic sets in.

Maybe, it’s just because this month is an expensive month for me, filled with various car-related payments (insurance, service, road tax – yay!). I’m not able to put anything in my savings for a while and that freaks me out. But I find myself panicking that my life is going nowhere, and thinking that I should be at the same stage as the other people I know. Now, rationally, I know that all of my friends have probably had this exact feeling despite how put together they look on the outside. I know for a fact that I have been one of the people inspiring the panic for at least one of my friends (she told me so), so I must not be doing as badly as I think but the problem is that once I think it and feel it, it’s a hard feeling to shake.

My self-confidence ebbs and flows. I can take compliments now, I am practised in the art of agreeing when people say nice things about me and not only agreeing but believing it too. But that confidence doesn’t extend to my worth as a person, I find it very difficult to imagine myself as someone who adds to the environment I am in, I know I am good at things but I never think I am good enough at those things (to be worth hiring or paying or sometimes just being around). I know that this is probably being exaggerated by my current lack of money and the worries that come from that.

I will probably be okay in a few weeks but until then, I will be huddled in the corner, like Golem, whispering my precious over all of the five pence pieces I can find.


This has been a blog entry, I think. I honestly don’t know what this was but I needed to write about it, so here you go. My humble Monday-evening-but-posting-Tuesday offering.

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One phrase we should really stop using

I might be alone in this. I might be the only person who thinks that this phrase is vile but we’re going to discuss it because I have an opinion, and opinions make for good blog posts (make a great post from a neutral standpoint, I challenge you). I don’t know when I started disliking it, but it occurred to me the other day that I definitely do dislike it and it’s actually quite creepy.

The phrase in question goes thus:

“[…] at the tender age of ______”

Everyone has read/heard/said that phrase somewhere. I think the eagle-eyed among you may even be able to find that very phrase somewhere in the recesses of this blog (I would be interested to know if you can, if anyone who isn’t me can be bothered to look – there are a lot of posts…). It looks pretty innocuous. It’s not rude, it’s quite common, what could possibly be wrong with it?

Well, pull up a chair, my curious little friend, for I am going to tell you. (We’re using our English Lit. degree today, pals, buckle up!)

It all has to do with three things: A) who is saying it, B) who they are saying it to, and C) the word ‘tender’, and we are going to discuss these in reverse order (because the rules of chronology are apparently too hard for me).

‘Tender’ isn’t a horrible word, it’s quite a good word. It can mean gentlekind-heartedaffectionate, and I have no doubt that when the phrase first came into fashion it was these definitions that were originally meant but that’s where my first problem arises. There is no gentle age. There is no affectionate age. Either you are affectionate and gentle, or you’re not. It’s not age which determines gentleness but experience, which brings me to my next definition.

‘Tender’ can be taken to mean inexperienced. Sure, you can be waxing about how you, at the tender age of five and three quarters were unaware of the trials and foibles you would be put through in your teens, and that is your right, but what about when someone else says it about you? I’m getting ahead of myself. One point at a time, Elou. I suppose I can accept the phrase when it is used in this way. You talking about your inexperienced self. That’s okay. That’ll get a pass.

But let’s look a bit more at ‘tender’. ‘Tender’ is sensitive to pain, ‘tender’ is vulnerable, ‘tender’ is easy to cut or chew. ‘Tender’ is delicious. How many times have you, when asked how the meat you are eating is have praised it as so tender? I have, many times. Now think of talking about a child at a tender age. Shudder.

On to point B. If you’re using the phrase you’re either talking about a child or someone who was a child at the time you are referring to, or you are probably ironically referring to yourself being at a tender age even though you are 32. Again, if you’re talking about yourself, fine. Go ahead, say what you will, enjoy yourself. But saying it about a child, or adolescent is still a bit creepy.

Think about it, you’re pointing out their inexperience, their vulnerability, you are bringing into focus the fact that they are weak and you, in comparison, are strong. The speaker gives themselves the power, which brings me swiftly to point A: who is saying it.

Imagine a professor or teacher, haughty, a middling age, let’s say 40-50. He has a slight paunch and a habit of talking down to people. Now, imagine him talking about a young girl at the tender age of eight.

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Tell me that isn’t creepy?

Take into account who he could be talking to, a colleague of equal age? A parent? The child herself? None of these options feel good to me.

Am I the only one who feels this way? Am I just blowing it out of proportion and taking an innocent phrase to a darker place, a place where it has no business being? You decide. Answers on a postcard. Or, you know, in the comments.

Top Tips for a Successful Blog!

So, I’ve been around for a while, often inconsistently and with little direction, but around I have been. I have had long periods of not updating, planned absences and unplanned ones. I’ve been blogging intermittently for a long, long time, first on Blogspot, then on a little sub-domain kindly gifted to me by a friend, then on my own domain, and now here, on Word Press (which is by far my favourite).

I thought it would be nice, as a break from the normal routine, to share some things that I have learnt about blogging while still maintaining your sanity (though that part is debatable).

Here we go!

Write posts in advance

Schedule, schedule, schedule! I try to always have at least one week of blog posts ready to go (my last planned blogging break was only a break because I hadn’t done this – more on that in a later entry). If I’m being really productive, I will have two!

This takes a lot of the pressure away from having to get posts up and really allows you to enjoy writing them, to take your time and really write the best post you can write. A rushed post is never going to be as polished as you would like (she says, when her posts are definitely not polished in the slightest…).

I don’t always write my posts in advance, I tend to schedule my Saturday, Tuesday and Thursday posts but I always allow myself the freedom to post outside of the schedule if I want to, or if I have an idea the I absolutely have to share right now.

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 If you have an idea, write it down

I have lost so many great post ideas because I didn’t write them down when I thought of them. Well, I say ‘great’, I don’t remember what they were so they could be complete trash.

Of course, I’m not saying you should write the post the moment you think of it. That would be ridiculous. I think of a lot of my posts in the shower and I certainly don’t take a pen, paper or electrical device in there but as soon as I get out, I scrawl it into a note on my phone and then transfer it into a giant google doc I have for exactly that purpose.

Sometimes, I start a new post and just include the title. Normally I do this when I want to write the post sooner, rather than later. (I have several of them sitting in my drafts right now.) Either way, write them down or else they will float off to the ether, never to be seen again.

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Don’t compare yourself to other bloggers

This is something I have fallen victim to. A lot of the blogs I follow have new posts every day and always have something witty or insightful to say about the subjects they’re blogging about. I pore over people’s monthly round up posts and marvel at everything they have achieved, and all the books that they have read.

I often wonder howHow do they get through that many books in such a small amount of time? That’s a stupid thing to wonder. For several reasons (a lot of them specific to book bloggers).

People read at different speeds, the amount of books you can read in a month doesn’t define your worth as a book blogger. It is your love of books and willingness to blog that makes you a book blogger.

The blogging community is vast and diverse. The person you’re comparing yourself to could be in high school, they could be full-grown adults with full-grown careers and children to boot! They could be like me, twenty-somethings who are still trying to make their own comfy little dent in the world. They could be male, female, non-binary, they could own a cattle farm in Guam (if there are cattle farms in Guam, I have no idea). They will have commitments and constraints on their time, or maybe they won’t, maybe blogging is their full-time work.

Other bloggers will have opinions that differ from yours, neither your nor their opinion is more valid than the other and neither diminishes you as a blogger. You don’t agree, write a blog post about it! Write an insightful article about why you think the way you do.

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Post what you want to post

So you’re a book blogger but you have this really cool idea for a food post, what do you do? Post it! If you’re interested in it, it will be interesting to the people who like reading your work. People are passionate about what other people are passionate about.

I have a few posts waiting in my drafts which have nothing to do with what I normally post, and every so often I post about my life and one day, I want to post about my outfits (when I wear something I am particularly pleased with); I will always post about books and words and folklore, but I will include smatterings of other things that interest me because this is my space to do with what I will.

Don’t be afraid to post outside of your little blogging box, it’s refreshing and there will be someone out there who will enjoy it.

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Engage with the community

For a long time, I didn’t follow other blogs. I existed in a vacuum where I was just writing my own stuff and not looking at anyone else’s. I got a fair few followers but very little engagement. I didn’t receive many comments, and when I did I don’t think I replied. When I started to blog regularly again, I made the decision to really make an effort with other blogs and it’s been great!

You will have seen that I’ve done a few tags recently, which was something I never thought would happen. I have people commenting on my blogs, and really engaging with my content. It’s so lovely to actually know that someone out there is reading your work and taking the time out of their day to let you know what they think of it but that only happens if you’re willing to do the same.

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Don’t be afraid to take a step back

Blogging shouldn’t be stressful. If you feel you need a break, take one. Your followers will still be there when you get back and they will understand. Your well-being is and always will be more important than your blog.

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I hope you find these helpful and would love to hear your top tips too! Have a wonderful Tuesday, pals.

In which I found a crack in the Universe

Or at the very least, imagined a poem by Edgar Allan Poe.

Hello, bloglings of varying shapes, sizes and mythical denominations. It has become increasingly obvious to me that I may have stumbled across a crack in the universe and now she’s trying her hardest to fill it in, to make me either forget about it or to convince me I am a little bit nuts and have made-up memories. Either way, it’s working, so here I am writing a blog post about it.

I realise that this all sounds a bit mad, so I am going to explain myself.

Circa 2011/2012 I was given a copy of the leatherbound Complete Tales and Poems of Edgar Allan Poe (Barnes & Noble Collectible Editions). It is a beautiful edition, which currently resides at my parents’ house due to my severe lack bookshelves and space to put bookshelves. I vividly remember flicking through this book in my bedroom the aforementioned parents’ house, I remember the room’s dark purples and limited light adding an ambience to the whole thing. I remember feeling the pages in my hands and flipping it open to a random point in the book.

I remember a very short poem. Shorter than any Poe I had ever read previously. It was about a grave/death. A woman being in the ground. I remember nothing else about this poem. I so vividly remember finding it and being so in love with it. I remember adding it to my profile on Elftown, my once upon a time internet hang-out. Naturally, I deleted it at some point so it is no longer there to find.

No one I know who enjoys Mister Poe seemed to be aware of this poem’s existence. Google searching phrases like ‘shortest Edgar Allan Poe poem’ yields stanzas upon stanzas and nothing even nearly as short as I remember. This had been haunting me for years but anytime I was near enough my copy of the book to check, I’d forgotten that it was bothering me. Clearly, the universe didn’t want me to know something.

To that, I say screw you, universe! (I’m kidding, I love you really, you contain the stars and the planets and the moon and I find all of those things fascinating and inspiring and terrible – the great unknown is always terrible – in equal measure.)

This story has a happy ending, though. I’ve had spurts of looking for this poem and failing for the last few years, and I’ve never progressed in my search. Until now. While ranting to my best friend, who humours all of my weird and wonderful ways and knows exactly when to offer sympathy even though I am being ridiculous, I suddenly had a vague flicker of memory which I have never had before. I was suddenly struck with the knowledge that one of the words in the poem was ‘earth’ and another was ‘deep’. In all my years of searching, I’ve never had any inkling of the contents except for a vague understanding of the theme (grave/death, woman – or so I presumed anyway).

The universe has finally decided I am ready.

It is with thanks to the universe (and a hope that the universe is not offended by my earlier comment), that I present to you my favourite poem which was found scribbled in the margins of the manuscript for ‘Eulalie’.

Deep in Earth (1847)

Deep in earth my love is lying
And I must weep alone.

On insta-love

Greetings, greetings, one and all. This is a bit of a weird one, bear with me though because I think it’s worth reading. (Well, would, I am the one writing it.)

Insta-love. Not the kind you show on instagram by liking as many of someone’s photos as is humanly possible in one sitting (though, that can be good) but the kind you see in books and movies. Often hailed as unrealistic and annoying and a plot-ruiner.

Well, I have a confession to make on that front.

It’s not that unrealistic. (Controversial?) Sure, if it’s terribly written or portrayed and you’re getting no feeling from either character, I can understand it ruining everything. But as a thing, on the whole, it’s not that bad. Love is weird and it’s different for everyone. This is common knowledge. A love being different to the love I experience, doesn’t make that love invalid and I would never dream of saying it does so why do we assume insta-love isn’t a thing?

Why am I writing about this? Why am I defending insta-love? Well, quite simply, because I feel it myself. Perhaps not full-blown cherubs-with-trumpets-I-want-to-spend-the-rest-of-my-life-with-you-immediately love but it’s very fast.

Context: I met my boyfriend through online dating, we spoke for maybe a week before we met each other in person. We spent a day together and before he went home, I ended up deciding ‘Yup, this is the person I want to be with.’ (If we’re being completely honest, I decided that about an hour into the day.) He agreed. And so we officially became a thing. I didn’t need a second date to know that he was who I wanted, or that a relationship with him was both what I wanted and right for me at the time. Over a year and a half later, and here we still are, living together harmoniously in a little flat on the top of a hill.

I can’t ‘date’. I don’t see the point in devoting time to someone I don’t see or want a future with. If I decide to be with someone it’s because I’m in it for the long-haul from day one. When I was doing the online dating thing, if I felt a strong connection with someone (like my other half) I would cease talking to anyone else on that platform until I had confirmed whether it was something both of us wanted to pursue.

I feel very quickly and very deeply – I felt strong feelings for my other half before we even met. I am exactly the kind of character that gets complained about for being unrealistic but does my existence not make all of those claims a little bit false? Sure, it might be annoying as hell, and it might be difficult to understand if it’s not something you go through, but it’s very much a real thing.

It’s not all sunshine and roses, it hurts when it goes wrong – especially when it goes wrong after a short period of time and the people around you can’t quite understand why you’re so upset about it. That side of things, I think, needs to be explored more. I’m all for happy, wonderful love stories but I’m also all for raw, emotional, painful, not-quite love stories.

A lot of the complaints about it come from young adult fiction, and TV shows and films aimed at teenagers but it’s very much something that teenagers go through. I had so many dramatic unrequited teenage crushes and my teenage relationship(s), other than being a train-wreck, were very much that immediate, sickly sweet kind and so were many of the other teen relationships going on around me. What’s important, I think, is that books/films/shows that deal in insta-love should also deal with how to react healthily to it ending. There are so few stories that I know of that can be used as an example of a healthy way of dealing with a break-up, if you know any, do share them.

Is it just me? Am I the only person on this planet who gets insta-love and doesn’t revile it on principle? Am I speaking into the void?

Words I Love: cloudland

cloudland – noun

  1. the sky
  2. a region of unreality, imagination etc.; dreamland
  3. a Utopian place

How wonderful is this word? How whimsical and beautiful?

d3I love clouds. I love cloud in the sky, I love clouds where there shouldn’t be clouds (and would love, love, love to see the work of Berndnaut Smilde in real life – I also love his name, it’s a great name), I love storm clouds, and wispy sunny day clouds. I love having my head in the clouds.

It is no surprise, then, that I love cloudland. It is one of many names for what I create, I make cloudlands in single frames (or multiple when those frames are part of my Cloudiverse). A lot of my favourite words have something to do with clouds.

They are whimsy in sort-of corporeal form. They are powerful and gentle in equal measure.

7857939112_064bee1fdd_kI particularly love the second definition: a region of unreality. It’s a wonderful phrase in itself, let alone it being summed up in one glorious word. It sounds magic, a quirky kind of magic. You wouldn’t find a bog standard witch or wizard creating a region of unreality. You’d find a crooked little magician, who lives in a crooked little house where most things are upside down and back to front, and all his cloudlands sit trapped in little boxes and jars and terrariums ready for release when he needs them.

It’s such an evocative word, I can see it every time I say it. The image I see is ever changing and immaterial. I love words that pull an imaginative response from me and this is certainly one of those words.

Just writing this has made me feel a fizzing urge to create something, anything. So perhaps, I shall. Maybe, there will be a story about a crooked little magician coming soon to a blog near you.

Words I Love: escutcheon

I’m a big fan of creating a series of posts on this blog, and so I am continuing to do so (and will continue to do so in the future – repetition be damned!). As you may already know, one of my greatest loves in life is words. I love the way they feel in my mouth, I love that we have a single sound to mean a certain thing and that we have so many of these in so many different languages that I could never list them all in my lifetime. So I’m going to talk about them.

There will be some overlap with my currently dormant Definition project (new images coming later this year, fingers crossed!), but all of it will be wholly new and lovely and I can’t wait to write these posts. In the spirit of not waiting, I am going to get cracking.


escutcheon – noun

  1. a shield or emblem bearing a coat of arms
  2. a flat piece of metal for protection and often ornamentation, around a keyhole, door handle, or light switch
  3. In medicine: the pattern of distribution of hair upon the pubic mound.
  4. A marking upon the back of a cow’s udder and the space above it (the perineum), formed by the hair growing upward or outward instead of downward. It was once taken as an index of milking qualities.
  5. The part of a ship’s stern where its name is displayed.
  6. A decorative and/or protective plate or bezel to fill the gap between a switch, pipe, valve, control knob, etc., and the surface from which it protrudes.
  7. The insignia around a doorknob’s exterior hardware or a door lock’s cosmetic plate.
  8. The depression behind the beak of certain bivalves; the ligamental area.

Origins: Latin – Anglo-Norman – Old French

I am going to note here that I only knew a few of the definitions before writing this entry, number three was not one of them and earned a raised eyebrow (or as much of one as I can muster with my feeble facial muscles). It was definitions 1, 2 and 6 that made me love this word for its meaning.

I didn’t realise that the metal ornament around a keyhole had a name, I didn’t realise there was a specific name for where the name of a ship goes. Even though they, and shields/emblems, are such vastly different things it managed to suit them. Somehow. Words are weird and wonderful and I love them. Escutcheon. Of course that’s what the bit of metal around a keyhole is called. Of course it is.

However, my love for it stemmed in actuality from Syfy’s rendition of Alice in Wonderland, titled simply Alice. Wherein the White Knight uses it in conversation in his wonderful voice. Unfortunately I can’t find a video nor a gif of it. I am saddened. You will have to take my word for it. Or watch Alice, which is great – you really should.

I just loved the way it sounded, then I said it myself and it’s just so fun to say. Try it. You’ll see. It’s such an awkward word, the spelling is awkward, saying it is awkward, I have now learnt that one of its meanings is awkward. I like awkward things. (Note: I do not like cringe-worthy awkward or obstinately awkward for the sake of being awkward. My meaning here is goofy awkward.) I, myself, am awkward, I always try to do things in the most awkward way possible because the straightforward ways of doing things just don’t occur to me, so I like words that sound awkward in the same way. If I dropped ‘escutcheon’ into conversation, I would wager that most people wouldn’t know what it meant. It’s quite awkward to drop into a conversation now that I think about it. I like that too.

Ah, words.

Photographic Aesthetic

There is something about viewing headlights through mist. Any lights, really. There is something about how beams of light are elongated and spread by fog which makes everything look that little bit more magical. And terrifying.

If you wear glasses, which I do, mist and fog is confusing. At first. It could just be that your glasses are fogged up or that there are smears on your lenses. Then when you take your glasses off it’s entirely possible that the mistiness could just be your poor eyesight. Light fog, I mean. Heavy fog falls like a blanket, and the heaviest fog spreads light in front like a wall. No more beams stretching ever forward, instead a block of light.

You hear talk of snow-blindness but you never hear about being fog-blind. If you’ve ever been behind the wheel of a car deep in dense fog during the night (with your headlights on) or during the day (without), you know what it means to be fog-blind.

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Fog is otherworldly. It transforms and shapes buildings, fields, trees, cars, lights into something other. There is no weather that changes the look and feel of a place so much as fog.

Mist and fog is my favourite weather to take photographs in (I may have mentioned this before) – it’s also one of the most tricky. But it is the kind of difficult that really pays off if/when you succeed.

It’s trickier still when wearing glasses, as are generally cold conditions. When your face is behind the camera, your breath fogs up your glasses and you end up having to wipe them every five minutes. It’s worth it. Creating magic is always worth it.

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Even when it’s not foggy, I try to bring a little bit of the aesthetic into my photographs (even the selfies and random snaps I post to my personal instagram – my current filter style is Gingham with extra fade, and other tweaks which depend on the photo). Often my photography has a slightly faded feel, I take that inspiration from the misty conditions I love to shoot in.

There’s just something about it, it’s hard to put my finger on why exactly. But it doesn’t quite look real, even though it is. It’s almost like a half-real thing. It fades sometimes as quickly as it appears and you never know how long it will stay.

It suits me though, and my whimsy. Hopefully this year will bring me more mist and more art, and more magic. We will have to wait and see.

Inspiration from Daily Prompt: Aesthetic

2017: Resolutions

New Year’s Resolutions are tricky beasts. They often don’t do quite what we tell them to. But make them, we do and this year I am no exception.

I’ve set myself a few, they’re all do-able and there is no reason why I shouldn’t have completed them by the end of the year. However, as is evident by this blog and the sporadic nature of its updates last year, life happens. I won’t beat myself up if I don’t achieve my goals but I’m going to give it a jolly good try.

I have seven resolutions this year. Seven.

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Read more. I read 18 books last year, which is terrible considering I read so quickly and I love reading so much – I blame Netflix and no longer having to commute. My plan is to top that this year, I am going to try for a book a week, which is a considerable feat but perhaps a necessary one. I have a to-read pile which is probably bigger than me and keeps growing because I have no self control in the books department. Absolutely none.

Write more. I don’t write even nearly as much as I should, be it blogs or stories or poems or drabbles. I went to university for three whole years to hone my writing abilities and I am doing absolutely nothing with it. I am going to attempt to change that this year. Starting now. Or rather, a few days ago when I wrote my last blog entry.

I will find excuses to write, and I will try not to pen myself in because that’s when I tend to get stuck. Leading on to the next resolution…

Update the bloomin’ blog.  I’m doing pretty well at this so far. I posted January 4th, then there’s this post, I have a book review in the making for something I read at the end of December (and the books I didn’t review but read last year), I have the next Harry Potter post on the go and will start number six after that, I have some wedding photography I would love to share, as well as a special shoot that hasn’t happened yet but will have happened by the time this post goes live (hooray for scheduling!). That’s a good lot to go on. Let’s just hope I don’t get lazy. Again.

15697559_10154914790763628_313091042453802651_nHit target. This is Slimming World specific. I am about half way on my weight loss journey (undertaken over the last five months). If I can make it to half way in five months, I can make the rest of the way in a year. I’m tentatively hoping to be at target some time in May. We shall see.

It shouldn’t be  too hard in the grand scheme of things. I love the plan, I love the food and I am already doing really well! I’ve wanted to be my smaller self for so long now that I am  going  to make it happen this year.

15780765_10154914790743628_2898177299689124980_nMaintain target. Now, this one relies on the success of the last one. So wish me luck.

I know that maintaining is going to be the hard part. I will be so used to losing weight that it will be hard to come out of that. I have faith though, I managed to accidentally maintain a few weeks ago and I know exactly how I did it. Let’s hope I remember that once I hit target.

Plus, I have the support of everyone around me. It’s been so heartwarming to see how everyone else has gotten excited for my losses and have cheered me on, or helped me stay on plan. I am so thankful.

Take more photos.  I mean this in both a life sense and a photography sense. When I put on weight my drive to take and be in photos plummeted. I photographed three weddings last year and they brought me so much happiness. I would like to continue that happiness. I want to create again and I want to document my life more than I have been of late. Expect a lot of instagram activity.

And finally, if something stops bringing joy, stop doing it – don’t feel guilty. Last year, I tried to draw every day. It started out really well and it was really fulfilling but then life got busier, I started a new job and my life changed. I was leaving my drawings until just before bed and I wasn’t happy with any of them. One day, I skipped drawing because I was tired. I told myself I was going to catch up, and I told others, but I realised I didn’t want to. I needed a break. So I took one.

I do intend to draw a lot more than I have previous years but forcing myself to do it once a day even when I have no ideas hampered my creativity and stopped being fun. So I’m resolving not to do that again, not to cling onto something for longer than I should just because I said I was going to. If it stops making me happy or excited or having a positive impact on my life, I am going to stop doing it. I’m not going to feel guilty about it.


Well, there you have it. My resolutions. I will come back to this next year and see if I’ve achieved them. Wish me luck!

The One Where I Return to the Internet, Again

Hello. I come to you this time not with apologies or excuses for my random disappearance, but with an explanation of my planned absence. Yep. You read that correctly, it was planned! I didn’t announce it but I planned it. (Though, it is probably not a coincidence that I planned it before my entry for The Goblet of Fire, as I will explain in the next entry, which will be that one.) I probably should have announced it but I didn’t want to give myself a date to be back by, I wanted to come back when I felt ready to.

In May, I left the world of commuting to and from London, working for a publisher and living in pretty little Oxfordshire. I had a big life change, and I needed time to get used to it.

Back in April, I was offered a job designing t-shirts in the West Midlands (book-themed, politics, pop culture, sport, you name it, and I probably do it). It seemed fun so I went for it. The location meant that I was able to move in with my long-suffering other half (long-suffering because he has to deal with me 24/7 now). I’ve been working there for three months now and the creativity is fab, it’s evolved from just t-shirts to stationery and social media and all sorts of things I didn’t think I would be doing. I even designed some wrapping paper!

My publishing job was the first job I ever really had so this is both the first time I’ve had a job move but also the first time I have moved in with a partner – everything in my life changed all at once, it wasn’t quite as overwhelming as I thought it would be.

In July, after over a year and a half of lessons (and a whole lot of emotions), I passed my driving test first time! I moved my beautiful car up to the West Midlands in August, and had the shock of my life when I dealt with my first really steep hill. Luckily, I’ve got the hang of them now, after a little bit of self doubt and wondering why, oh why, they had let me pass my test.

A bit later in July, I decided to embark on a journey. A Slimming World journey. If you follow my Tumblr, you may have seen some body image posts in the past. I’ve struggled with my body for a long time, lost lots of weight in short periods of time by being very, very unhealthy and then put it back on again and then some when I got comfortable. I’ve resolved not to do that anymore. Slimming World is excellent, I am a fair way away from my target but I feel healthier and I am eating excellent food. I may post about my food at some point. I have since set up an Instagram devoted to my SW journey, it’s mostly food, but if you want to follow it, you can find it here.

What else has happened? I’m currently working on my second bit of wedding editing of the year, the third will come in November. Both weddings were lovely and I may post about them in the future.

All in all, I’ve been super busy, and I finally feel like my life is settling into a routine, and blogging can be part of it again.